12 Days

I am a little frustrated with myself today.. I have been doing everything possible to put off homework and studying today. I don't know why but I have absolutely no motivation for school right now. I don't know if its just because Steve's graduation is soon or if its just because I know I won't be going to this school next year but its starting to bug me. The worst part about it is I know I am doing it... I just have such a hard time forcing myself to do something I have no motivation to do. Ugh Steve would be so upset with me if he knew how little time I have spent on school so far. But last year once he decided he was joining the Air Force he didn't do anything for school so he can't really say much to me about it. He will say something to me about it tho even tho he did the same thing. I just need to get it together. I want him to be as proud of me as I am of him.. getting the grades that I got last semester is not the way to do it. So after this post I am forcing myself to do my homework! First tho I of course have to talk about my man! Today is friday so that means he made it through beast week! I am sure he is supper happy its over because I know he wasn't really looking forward to it. I was a little upset by his last letter because he seems to be having a rough time lately. I sent him a question/answer thing for him to send back to me and on it he said he was starting to question joining because its not what he expected =[ I was really sad to hear that and I just hope it gets better for him in Tech school. Everyone says it gets easier so maybe he's just down after being there for so long.. My poor baby I just can't wait to hold him and make him feel better! I love you Stephen!